Father Christmas Purchases Memorable Non Geographical Number.

‘Tis the season to be jolly! At least, it is in Father Christmas’ case as he invests in a memorable and unique non geographical number this Christmas.

This purchase comes after complaints filed in last Christmas as customers were unable to contact Santa and his elves. His previous ‘Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh’ number was a real put off for customers as it renown for being a premium rate telephone number. As little boys and girls struggled to tell Father Christmas if they had been good or bad, parents across the country refused to pay the extortionate rate that those numbers carry with them.

‘I don’t care whether Timmy gets his Xbox or not, I am not paying 50p a minute to call Lapland,’ one mother proclaimed. ‘What? He’s now using an 0800 Numbers? Brilliant! I will be calling him up with our Christmas list later on.’

It is understood that Father Christmas bought his number from Planet Numbers, who offer thousands of highly memorable and unique 0845, 0844, 0800 and 03 numbers, in a desperate attempt to bring back the children who had lost belief in Christmas.

Planet Numbers Vow To Help Failing Businesses

The business world is collapsing around the civilians of this country as one of the largest banks in the world, Lehman Brothers, declares itself bankrupt. The bank, who were more than $613 billion in debt, filed for bankruptcy after attempts to rescue it from liquidation had been thwarted.

Times are looking grim for the economy at present but is there any possible solution to this crisis?

There once was a time when the streets were awash with corner shops and little family run businesses. Places where your custom was valued, appreciated and deserved. Places that ensured that when you purchased something from the shop, be it a suit, a bun from the bakers or even your laundry at the launderette, you knew that you would get quality customer service and products built with care, precision and effort. Although the films portray it as a time of black and white it seems it was a far more colourful place than the world we live in today. Today, as you walk through your local Tesco or HMV, you are greeted with zombie-like grunt by the characterless, money driven staff that inhabit our convenience stores.

So why do we shop there? Why do we give our custom to the big companies who monopolise the streets with the giant chain markets?

I walked into my local Tesco this weekend looking to buy a bottle of Heinz tomato ketchup. The monotonic beep of the checkouts imitating the robots these staff aspire to be pierce my ears as I begin my vain attempt to find my item. The towering aisles offering to help my with my search, vaguely pointing me in the right direction. When I find it and take it to the checkout staff who looks the least like Shrek, I'm greeted by the much practiced fake smile as they take my £1.94 and force the receipt into my hands. I begin to l... Wait... £1.94? I check the receipt and sure enough, the 'robot' had been experiencing technical difficulties. I had been charged twice. I was furious, my face redder than the tomato ketchup I had just purchased. I stormed up to the checkout as the plastic smile of the operator tried to calm me down. 'Is there a problem?' Said the girl, spitting at me through her braces. I glanced at her name badge. What a strange name. 'Well, Melanie HERETOHELP.' I seethed. 'If that IS your real name. It seems you have charged me twice.' I could tell she was thinking hard to remember her training.'

- Smile
- Sympathise with customer
- Sort the problem out accordingly.

'I'm going to have to get my supervisooooooooooooo...oooo...oooor.' she said, holding the end of the sentence for far too long.

After about 10 minutes of watching this young girl being trained by a lady who was clearly heavily pregnant, bringing the total of braincells in that body to two. I finally received my change and left very dissatisfied. My fish fingers, chips and ketchup meal that night was rather soured.

How much would you pay for a smile? For good customer service? What is an extra 20p to brighten up your shopping experience? It's places like Tesco that are the reasons why you see boarded up shops and the average man's dream of starting his own business slowly fade down the drain.

Planet Numbers do everything in their power to help these businesses. They offer memorable and unique business telephone numbers to help these floundering companies generate extra business and gain extra income. Having a memorable and unique non-geographical telephone number makes it much easier for customers to call because 0845 numbers, 0800 numbers, 0844 and 03 numbers can be remembered off the top of their head.

Soon, Planet Numbers could be savior of hundred of businesses around the country.

Why XL Went Bust...

THOUSANDS OF holiday makers were stranded this weekend after the UK's third largest package holiday group went bust. With another 200,000 advance bookings grounded, Planet Numbers ran an investigation asking why all these holiday makers' breaks were ruined.

The sun is shining, you've reserved your sunbed by the pool and you've got your drink from the poolside bar as you rub a little bit more sun tan lotion on your already sun kissed back. For many, this sounds like bliss but one family we spoke to just couldn't wait to get home.

The Henderson family from Brighton booked their holiday to Majorca in February 2007 using XL's package deal. 'We had been saving up for around a year.' said Keith Henderson, a newspaper distributor from Kent. 'The kids were so excited and the journey to Majorca went without a hitch. The hotel was clean and very reasonable and the food was fantastic. However, after we had packed our bags ready to come home we discovered that XL had gone out of business which meant we were stranded.' At this point Keith Henderson had to leave the room as he struggled to keep back the tears. When he returned several minutes later he said. 'We had to stay in sunny Majorca for, we were told, at least another 3 days. There's only so much amazing food, beautiful weather and pure bliss and relaxation one can take. We just couldn't wait to get back to cloudy, dull England.'
Planet Numbers understands that one of the Henderson children has consequently put on half a pound of weight due to the delicious food and the mother is slightly sunburnt.

Could this have been avoided? Could XL have been saved from administration? Could poor little Billy Henderson be that half a pound lighter and avoided the inevitable bullying? Planet Numbers says yes.

A recent article, written by the talented Alex Deutsch, noted how Planet Numbers were saving businesses by offering them memorable and unique non geographical telephone numbers. '0845 Numbers, 0844 numbers, 0800 numbers and 03 numbers are the most profitable thing you could possibly buy for your business. Unless you own an airline, in which case it's probably aeroplanes. Although we do suggest putting your memorable and unique telephone number on the side of the aircraft to generate extra interest.' said the office administrator for Planet Numbers 'By buying a memorable and unique 0845 Numbers, 0844, 0800 and 03 number your customers will be able to call your company easily meaning extra income for you!'
Planet Numbers has very kindly offered to lend CAA their rocket, seen in the the Planet Numbers logo, to go return all the stranded holiday makers to their homes. The rocket, which holds 3 people at a time and can only fly upwards, is thought to take around 36 light years to get to the desired location and back. The CAA suggest you walk.

Air We Go!

BOURNEMOUTH, THE CALM and tranquil seaside town, felt like Heathrow airport this weekend. Planes worth as much as £52million took off from the comparative model village airport, Hurn, as the much anticipated Air festival got underway. However, as exciting as the aeroplanes were, the plane fanatic's eyes were diverted to something quite unexpected as Planet Numbers offer 0845 numbers with no incoming call charges.

As the sun peeked through the ever-collecting clouds to catch a glimpse of the sensational aircrafts that majestically circled the town, like bees circling the honey comb, something else special was happening not far from the seafront. In a small office, just off the town centre, seven individuals were working hard to offer the world 0844 Numbers telephone numbers. Planet Numbers, who are keen Red Arrows fans, worked tirelessly to deal with the huge demand of the non-geographical numbers while the stunning show was taking place.

'We're offering customers highly memorable 0844 Numbers for their businesses because by having a highly memorable and unique telephone number businesses are much more likely to receive telephone calls therefore more custom.' Said the very excitable John Kenward who had to be restrained from running to the window every time he heard the sound of a plane. 'We know that the RAF have already caught wind of this great initiative by having their very own 0844 Numbers and urge other businesses to do the same.'

Planet Numbers would like to remind people that there are thousands of non-geographic telephone numbers to chose from and to ask them not to panic as there are enough for everyone. This statement comes after the riot that came in July 2008 where as many as three business men stampeded through the town of Bournemouth as they raced for non-geographic telephone numbers. This unfortunate event resulted in three snails being killed, one snail's shell severely damaged and one is now a slug.


*Tributes are now being held for the three snails tragically lost that day at All Saints church, Southbourne. The parents of the snails ask that you don't bring any flowers, as they will be eaten, but to donate whatever you can to Shell Research - the foundation for fixing broken shells. All are invited.*

Emergency Services Back Planet Numbers!

THE UK EMERGENCY services have backed Planet Numbers by agreeing it is essential to have a memorable and unique telephone number. This has come after Planet Numbers offered companies around the country non-geographic telephone numbers with a great response.

'I believe it is essential to have a memorable telephone number!' exclaimed a emergency switchboard operator. 'In the year 1802 our telephone number was 8397772883947920019928837777771 which wasn't very memorable and we discovered we weren't getting many calls in an emergency. Now it's 999 and we get literally thousands of calls a day! Getting a memorable telephone number was the best thing to ever happen to us. I really recommend it!'

Although 999 is now taken and is put to good use there are thousands of non-geographic 0845, 0844, 03 and 0800 Numbers to be taken advantage of. Planet Numbers offer the best!

THREE SNAILS KILLED - Planet Numbers EXCLUSIVE!!

CHAOS SWARMED the streets today as a rampage of suited businessmen stormed through the town of Bournemouth. The small seaside town in Dorset shook as news leaked that Planet Numbers were selling unique and memorable non-geographical telephone numbers.

Many companies who previously had a geographical telephone number have bought an 0845 Numbers, 0844 Numbers or 03 Numbers in hope of generating new customers after an article from Planet Numbers suggested that it could save businesses. 'I used to have a geographical telephone number for my company that sold second hand plasters' said one businessman, who was pulled out of the stampede.'For some reason I wasn't getting much business until I purchased an 0845 Number, and an 03 number! After that the calls came flying in!'

The rampage of businessmen wanted a non-geographic number as quick as possible and left a wake of mess as they stampeded through the town. Planet Numbers understands three snails, who are yet to be named, have been killed in the chaos as they couldn't get out of the way fast enough. One snail's shell has been seriously damaged and another is now a slug.

Planet Numbers had this to say: 'We are very sorry for the snails who lost their lives and our thoughts are with their families. We would like to stress that there are thousands of memorable and unique telephone numbers and urge people not to panic, there is enough for everyone!'

Planet Numbers Saved My Business!

AN EXTRAORDINARY tale of a floundering business saved by a telephone number has gripped the nation by storm. 'We Fail At Life Lmt.' who sold used socks were severely damaged by the recession. 'We were losing customers by the hour' said one representative. 'Either people didn't have a need for used socks anymore or our customers couldn't remember our geographical telephone number!'

The company's telephone number, not the easy to remember 0844 or the 0845 Number with no incoming call charge, was boring and hard to remember. 'We were running out of idea's,' said another member of staff. 'People just weren't phoning in. We were losing so much money because we didn't have an 0844 or 0845 number while our rivals were reeling them in with their memorable, unique 0844 number or 0845 number.'

They decided to visit Planet Numbers to see what numbers they had. They were amazed by all the memorable and unique non-geographical numbers they had to offer.'

They were pleasantly surprised to learn that Planet Numbers would connect our numbers withing 24 hours.

'The service was superb, the office administrator was very helpful and I imagine he'd be very good looking and the connection time was brilliantly fast!' said the really hot We Fail At Life representative. 'We are bringing in hundreds of new customers just because of our unique and memorable 0845 Numbers!'

'Thank you Planet Numbers'

0845 Is The Magic Number!

CONTRARY TO POPULAR BELIEF, 3, the UK's favorite number isn't actually that magic! Studies show that non-geographic numbers such as 0845 Numbers and 0844 Numbers are actually much more magical.

We contacted Planet Numbers and asked why.

'Well after years of extensive research we discovered that if you type the number 3 into your telephone there is no-one to answer.' said Alex Deutsch, the office administrator for Planet Numbers. 'We have had much more luck talking to people who put 0845 in front of their telephone numbers'

This has come as quite a shock to many UK residents who believed THREE was infact the magic number. Band 'Blind Melon' even wrote a song about the said number describing just how magic it really is.

'We have contacted Blind Melon to discuss with them changing that number from 3 to 0845 Numbers. Although it will not be as catchy Blind Melon are actually committing a crime by advertising THREE being the magic number.'

Planet Numbers has literally SOME phone calls with companies wanting to purchase an 0845 Number to replace their previous number!

Planet Numbers - Christmas and Birthday Rolled Into One

THIS CHRISTMAS might not be the typical white Christmas one might expect. Thousands of children around the country are ditching the idea of a Playstation or Xbox under the big green tree this year and asking Santa for a rather unusual present.

0845 Numbers sales have dramatically increased since August as businesses are investing in memorable and unique telephone numbers. Companies who previously had a geographical number are realising that a non-geographical number will generate much more business.

However, it's not just the suited businessmen who have caught wind of the great initiative. Children as young as four have begun buying 0845 Numbers. www.planet-numbers.co.uk office administrator Alex Deutsch asked one infant why he wanted Santa to bring him an 0845, 0844 or an 03 number.

'I like colouring.' He said, as he smacked his Power Ranger round this reporter's head. 'I want a sweeties.'

Although some people may disagree with young Jamie's powerful words, there is no denying that he is a business minded man with a bright future ahead of him.

Planet Numbers

Planet Numbers Reduce Chance Of Heart Attack

SCIENTISTS DISCOVER new evidence that having a memorable and unique telephone number could maybe reduce the chance of having a heart attack. The study comes after a complaint to OFCOM after a man tried to call a company with a not memorable geographical number.

'I was trying to call to buy some pegs as I had run out and I needed to put the washing out.' Said Alan Smith, a newspaper distributor from Stockport. 'I knew the company I needed to call but I couldn't for the life of me think of the number! All of a sudden I was having a heart attack... Or was it heartburn? Either way, it hurt.'

Police investigated the complaint and came to the conclusion that 'This man's heart attack or heartburn could have been prevented if the company had a memorable and unique non-geographical telephone number. We suggest Planet Numbers who provide 0845 Numbers, 0844 Numbers or 03 Numbers.'

This isn't the only time that having a hard to remember geographical telephone number had caused a casualty. In 1905 George Marshall a chimney sweep from London, who uses an 0845 Number, stubbed his toe while trying to remember a phone number. 'I was walking around the house trying to think of a number - it was made a lot more difficult by the fact telephones hadn't been invented - when i stubbed my toe on the table.' George sued the company and won 3 shillings, a button and half a pig. 'If only Planet Numbers was around' he said 'then I might still have a toenail on my little toe.' He suggests all businesses get in contact with Planet Numbers and get their 0845 Numbers before it's too late.

Planet Numbers - Zero to Hero!

A LOCAL BUSINESS has shot to success after offering companies memorable and unique non-geographic business telephone numbers. The phenomenal site offers 0845, 0844 numbers, 0800 numbers and 03 numbers.

Office Administrator of Planet Numbers, Alex Deutsch said 'This is a fantastic opportunity for companies to generate extra business by having an original and highly memorable non-geographic telephone number!'

'Above all', he continues 'by buying a non-geographic number you can actually save money as there are no incoming call charges.'

This extraordinary success story of young entrepreneur Robin James caught the eye of many local residents. He was furious with companies ripping their customers off with premium rate phone lines and decided to do something to help. 0870 numbers are now classed as premium rate numbers. '0845 Numbers and 0844 numbers will help customers and companies in this time of the credit crunch.'

Many business' compliment Planet Numbers for the friendly customer service and the fast connection speed of 24 hours.